sfran

this post is way overdue.

if you didn't know this already, i've been working very hard for some india documentary for school. i was at school 7 days a week for at least 10 hours a day... most of which was sitting on my ass, in front of a computer screen, color correcting or toning.

anyways... i was in desperate need for a break.

so when break week rolled around (3/1-3/7) i knew i had to get away.

i called my partner in crime (alexandria cesena, duh), and we decided that we have to get out of this fucking black hole of boring day-to-day bulllllllshit and do some exploring. honestly, we both just needed a little change of scenery.

i kidnapped jeffjohns and smurphy, alex got the escalade, and we headed to SAN FRAN for some bad decisions and good times.

oh, and a little photography, of course.

so on the way to sf... another car called 911 on us for supposed reckless driving.

we just got a warning... but funny as hell. yeah yeah, alex was doing some interesting manoeuvers with her car through traffic, but was it really bad enough to CALL THE POLICE?? i think not.


then we arrived...
48 hours in san francisco: reflection.


















exactly what i needed...

indian food; bars; bad decisions; drunk; explore; lasagna; sleep; wake up; shoot; market; chinatown; chinese food; the wharf; sourdough and tomato soup; the haight; nap; thai food; bar hopping; shots; drunk; watch alex jump for at least an hour straight; bad decisions; pass out; wake up; drive home; success.

in other words

DONUTS AND HAPPY ENDINGS.


i love us.

peace.

i'm bAck.

HI! i've missed you all so very much.


that's bailey behind me.. he's one of my new roommates.

let me give you a short recap of what's going on in my life:

SVARA premiere... ONE WEEK away.
so excited/scared out of my mind.
i can't wait!

i moved......... and i'm not currently enrolled in school (though i've been there everyday for 12 hours working on the openings).
i'm living with jeff johns
we're bad news together.. it's trouble.

i'm going to mexico for two months (may-june)
My cousin Helio will be there with me for part of the time
i'm going to become fluent in spanish.
it's going to be amazing!

besides mexico, i'm going to be living at home until the sep-oct session, which is when i'll be starting classes again.

AND, if Pauldo accepts me, i'm going on the next doc trip to CHILE.

explanations for all of this will come soon.

now... some fun.

haiku by smurphy


a note from p.brain to sam and me while we were rush color correcting for the av show.




in like 2 weeks...
i will have nothing left to do for india.
what am i going to do with my life????
it'll be so weird to not be busy 24/7.
i think it's going to suck.
.
.
but that's why i want to go to chile!!!

that's all for now.

peace.

SVARA SVARA SVARA

I CANNOT EXPRESS TO YOU HOW BADASS MY INDIA GROUP IS.

i screened the AV show today...

it is unbelievable.

the stories are told beautifully.
the transitions are SICK.
the sound use is incredible... both the sound we recorded and the music the av group chose for the stories.

OH MY GOD.

i am so proud to be part of this group.

FUCK!!!

i'm so excited! :)

i don't even care that my ass is becoming deformed due to WEEKS of sitting in a chair, staring at a computer screen.
i don't even care that it's been so long since i've been around new people that i've forgotten how to be social.
i don't even care that i may be losing friends because i have been literally living at school.
i don't care that there's possibly a rat in my house because it's a disgusting mess.
AND i don't even care that i only see people in color percentages of CMYK now.

that's how awesome this project is.

ohhhhh man. you should all be jealous.

APRIL 2, 2009.
we are going to blow people's minds.

peace.

rain drops

it just keeps piling up

fuck.

it's been a tough week.

end of last week:
-brought up some shit that needed to be dealt with in my india group. a few people got really pissed at me.

-since some were already mad at me... i decided to get the balls to call my mom and tell her about the tattoos. that didn't go over too well.

-then i saw my parents in person... and they let me have it for several hours.

-more color correcting

this week:
-car and phone issues

-upset more people today... to the point of yelling.

-and to top it off.. 380 more images to color correct. by tomorrow.

This project is consuming me.

you know, i hate playing this role. i hate being this person that has to bring up the problems. i don't like the drama. i hate it. i just know that if i don't do what i think is best for the group, i wont be able to live with myself. and THAT i would hate more.

i wish (and i know a number of other people wish this, too) i could sit back and say nothing.

bleh.

Anyways, on a more positive note . . .
i saw the pretty much final edit of the india book today!
it looks amazing!
if you didn't buy a presale from me, you should have.
it's soo cool to see all of our hard work put together into this beautiful HARDCOVER book.

We are awesome.






i miss justin.
sorry i haven't been a good friend lately, buddy.
i'll make it up to you soon.

and jbeezy.
live closer, dammit.

i miss scott. he was my best friend.
scott was the best at times like these; he always knew how to make me laugh.
i would go home to him after a long day of bullshit, and he would listen patiently and feed me.
then we would lay in bed and make fun of all of the bad actors on tv.
it was the best.
god i miss him.


fucking emo post.

it has to get worse before it gets better, right?
well i think it's time to get better.

i have some fun stuff to post up for next time!

...including a fun little sound bite.

i'm going to bed.

peace.

smeagol.

i am SO sick of color correcting.

this sucks. i have no say or real influence on the creative process of the book. i thought this session would be a lot of fun, but i'm totally over it. i was REALLY excited to help design the book. i even took tutorials on ask linda for indesign.

instead, i'm just doing technical work. bullshitbullshitbullshit.

i need a creative outlet. someone find me a project, fast.

i'm not upset with anyone in my group, or anything. i understand that having too many people working on the design and layout would be disastrous. someone has to do the color correcting, and i am good at it.

dammit, i wish i wasn't.

IT'S BEEN BEAUTIFUL OUTSIDE... and i've been stuck inside photoshopping like a tool.

i must say, it's easy to procrastinate when you're suppose to be doing something you don't enjoy.

i had so much passion for this project... but it's slowly fading. i guess i just thought i would be playing a more important role.

the book is going to be great, regardless. it's really coming together quite nicely.

seven more months of bullshit school work... that's it.

chop chop chop.

i'm SO bored.

does anyone want to play? i want to play some sort of game. like capture the flag! do you remember that game? think about all of the possibilities now that we are full grown! we could have the most epic game EVER.

i'm going to the beach tomorrow. that's fucking it. i'm so sick of working. i'm gong to take at least an hour out of my day to sit on the beach and read. i'm going to bring two capri sun splash coolers (best flavor ever), a water, and a book. dammit, i don't even know where to look in my mess of boxes to find a beach towel.

god i'm bored with myself.

i'll leave you with this...



my voice is a bit off because i'm still a bit sick.... i think.

peace.

six.

so i am a big ball of crazy.


i'm sick. the book is due in 5 days.
.......i got sick during crunch time. great.

last night i had a very tough time sleeping. i'm a bit feeverish, so i had pretty intense chills. on top of that, my throat is slowly closing in on itself.

so this is where my craziness kicked in..

i was in and out of dreams all night about how if my throat really does close up, NO ONE would know and i would die a lonely lonely hag.

see, at first my dreams were about how i wake up panicked because i cant breathe... but since i live by myself, i have no one to help me. so i go to the front house where my landlord lives, to try to wake her up... but the damn dogs keep barking and jumping at me. i'm so weak and can't breath, i fall and die while the dogs lick my face.

i might have been crying in my sleep... hah!

i'm a very positive person, i swear.

then i was hallucinating about passing out in class because of lack of oxogen to my brain. my professor would have to call 911 and paramedics would come to save me. luckily, i was wearing one of my cute bras, so when they had to rip off my shirt i wasn't embarrassed.

one of my classmates, who was really zach braff (i've been watching A LOT of scrubs lately), performs CPR on me until the paramedics arrive, and stays with me while they take me to the hospital. i have emergency surgery to get my tonsils removed, and while i recover, i color correct images for the book in my hospital bed. by the way, my gown in the hospital was xmen themed. bamf.

like i said before, BIG BALL OF CRAZY.

i guess i'm just subconsciously weirded out because this is my first time being single in FIVE YEARS, i moved to a city where i know no one, and i'm living by myself for the first time.

i'm SO lame.


Have you ever closed your eyes and typed every thought that enters your head? i don't care what justin says, it's totally possible because i did it. i got so absorbed in my thoughts that before i knew it, 20 minutes had passed. it's crazy because i had no idea what i wrote down.

i wish i had the balls to post what i typed, it's just WAY too revealing.

you should try it, though. i highly recommend it.



i love my india group but geezus, if i'm not smiling for like longer than two minutes EVERYONE asks me what's wrong. i guess i should be flattered by their concern, but when the hell did i become the designated happy chick?

i fell asleep on the lawn chairs out by the pool on campus today.
it was amazing.

have you ever wanted to rip your clothes off and run naked? today was one of those days for me.
maybe that's the medicine talking.



can i just give a huge shout out to miss alexandria cesena...
i fucking love you. thank you for listening to all of my bullshit about school. you're the only one who really listens to me, and for that you should get a nobel peace prize. if i didn't have someone to talk to about it, i would have blown something up. i know half of the time you're humoring me, but it's the effort that counts.

i don't know how you put up with me.

i wish you were a dude.

and thanks to justin...
even though i can HEAR your eyes roll back into your head whenever i bring up anything about my book group bullshit, i appreciate the fact that you constantly try to distract me with funny anecdotes and food.

you keep me sane.

this is longer than i expected. . .



peace.

ohhhh say can you.......

i think the best when i'm in the shower.
i need a waterproof recorder to record my thoughts.

busy busy busy bee.

there are SO many more productive things i should be doing instead of writing this blog. it's sad.

anyways...

don't ever tell me the following words when i misplace or lose something: "it's always the last place you look."

....i will fucking kill you.
OF COURSE IT'S THE LAST PLACE I LOOK. why the HELL would i keep looking after i find it? who thought of that saying??!

someone (who will remain nameless) said that to me yesterday, and i gave that person a looooooong lecture on how only dumbasses use it.

it frustrates the hell out of me only because i misplace everything so i hear that saying all of the time.
all the time?
all of the time?
meh.

****side note: i'm not mad today or anything... just wanted to share a few thoughts***

also..

i was driving behind this suv the other day, and they had 5 bumper stickers. all of them were about christianity (which i have NO PROBLEM with) but two of them were making me mad: Got Jesus? and Got Faith?.

now, mister suv man, i'm totally down with your faith.. but be a little bit more creative with the way your expressing it, okay? first, you have FIVE stickers about your faith. i'd believe you if you had just one. but i understand that you're super into it, however, "GOT ____" is so overused already, and you used it twice? COME ON!!

*sighhhh

on more of a positive note...
BARACK OBAMA IS OUR PRESIDENT.
how awesome is that???
i'm proud of us, america.

so, remember how i was super excited about the title we picked for the india project? well we've changed it... twice. the first time we changed it, i really didn't like it. But we chose again, and this one i'm okay with. i'm not as excited as the first one, but i don't expect that all of the decisions made by a group of 20 people are going to make me excited. but it's good. rolls right off of your tongue.

i'm still not telling you what it is, though.

the past 3 days of my life have felt like a month. is that normal?

The beegeez (book group) are meeting every day until february 2nd. yesterday was a 12 hour day for me. it was....long.

i hope i don't get fat from this.

everyone shot AMAZING images. i'm very proud to be a part of this group! we're killing it!

i need to clean my room.

peace.